i think cynicism, disbelief, or withholding emotion/support/love is a form of murder to an idea or a person. and you lose nothing by risking believing. you have a shot. but if you never believe, you don't even get the quiet erotic birth of a vision coming into being.
an idea that can steer your life and give you purpose and energy is life itself.
i'm not talking about "i'll never steal from you again, baby!" kind of naivte. i mean quietly believing in the huge possibility of someone coming up with a new, better idea, instead of assuming everything's been done and everyone's full of shit and all women are out to fuck you.
just like i wrote about having the wide open heart of a slut who has the talent/skill to fall in love with every fuck, even if for 10 minutes---i think that the ability to believe in the epiphanies or possible empowerment of someone as previously ineffectual as a shmuck like charlie sheen, is the ability to believe in the epiphanies and possible empowerment of a shmuck like YOURSELF.
and when you believe in someone in the moment, not after when it's safe and hindsight is 20/20, you can change an outcome. it's how love can breathe life into someone.
think about it. as much as we spend our lives trying to perfect our swaggers, or our abilities to find peace about its elusiveness, we usually think we're nothing. we find lovers and movie stars to spackle over our inadequacies or ignored dreams and talents, and we talk a good confidence game. but at 3am, when you're all alone in bed with the sounds of cops and cabdrivers outside, you can admit the truth that it's a fucking struggle to feel worthy enough to get out of bed. lo!-if it weren't for the responsibilities that seem so important in the light of day!
